How do I forgive someone who abused me
Slowly, honestly, and without ever confusing forgiveness with what it is not. Forgiveness is not saying it did not matter, not trusting them again, not returning to unsafe access, and not skipping justice - Scripture pursues both mercy and justice, and reporting a crime is compatible with a forgiving heart (Romans 13:1-4 gives authorities that role). Forgiveness is releasing your claim to repay them, and handing the debt to the only Judge who sees everything: 'avenge not yourselves...
Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord' (Romans 12:19). It usually is not one moment but a decision renewed many times - Jesus' 'seventy times seven' (Matthew 18:22) applies even when it is the same wound resurfacing. Reconciliation, by contrast, requires their genuine repentance and changed behavior, and sometimes safety means it never happens in this life - that does not make your forgiveness incomplete.
Take this journey with help: a trauma-aware counselor and safe believers (James 5:16). And know that God's heart is fiercely for the harmed: 'A father of the fatherless... is God in his holy habitation' (Psalm 68:5).
From Bible Navigator's study library. Scripture quotations are from the King James Version (public domain). This is encouragement for study and reflection, not professional counseling - if you are in crisis, call or text 988.